Much like this post, I've started this post numerous times, only to end up deleting it. After reading this moving post yesterday over at Real Life Blog, I've finally decided to get it out there. This way others can hear my story and maybe you can better understand me and where I'm coming from. Little did I know it then, but this is where my frugality began. Rather unwillingly.
In 2000, I was a senior in high school. I was enrolled in many advanced classes, some earning college credit, and I was excelling academically. After graduation I had every intention of going to a popular University in my state, so that I could further my education and become a pediatrician. I had my future completely planned out. I wasn't going to get married until I was atleast 25 so I could focus on school, and I didn't want children until I was atleast 27.
Then it happened.
My world as I knew it was shaken.
I suspected that I was pregnant, so I went to Wal-Mart and bought a pregnancy test. I promptly went into their bathroom and took the test. It showed those infamous 2 blue lines. Surely it wasn't accurate. I ignored it, and went on with my business. Over the course of 2 months, I took 10 home pregnancy tests. All of which said I was pregnant. I finally decided that they only way I was going to get an accurate result (I was still thinking accurate meant negative) would be to go to the pregnancy support clinic. It, too, was positive. There was no denying it anymore.
My parents hated my then-boyfriend, for various reasons, and they had just recently forbid me to see him. How in the world was I going to tell them my news?! At this point I was about 4 months along. The only people that knew were my boyfriend, and 3-4 of my closest friends. At one point one of my friend's moms called my mom and told her I was pregnant, but my mom didn't believe her. As a matter of fact, when she got off the phone, she was laughing. She seriously thought it was a joke. This came the very night I had finally found the courage to tell them. Once that happened, I chickened out and went back to figuring out my plan.
I could not fathom facing my parents and telling them how big of a failure I was. What would they say?
I did what I thought I had to do.
One evening I finally decided that I would tell my parents in the morning. I had Open Block (no class for the first block of that day), and I had to go to work right after school and close. I worked at a fast food restaurant, and closing meant I ended up being home around midnight--or later, depending on if we hung out after work or not. So I did it.
I wrote a note. Yes, you read that right. A Note. I left it on the table while my mom was running errands and my dad was at work. Since my day was busy, I knew I wouldn't have to face them until the next morning.
But boy was I wrong!
*I'll leave it there for now. There is no way my story could fit into one post, so be sure to check back for future installments.*
Part 2: It's All Out
Part 3 : I'm A Mom
Part 4: More Trials
Part 5: Surely I'm Dreaming
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
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22 comments:
Love you, Phoebe. Your courage in telling this story shows your strength of character. So in awe of teenage moms who make it work!
Cheering you along as you tell your story - this experience hasn't been wasted and you can encourage others through your journey.
I cannot imagine how scared you must have been. There are a lot of people who will benefit from your courage in sharing this.
I'm amazed by the courage this took to share. I know God will use it to encourage others. I'm really glad you shared. Sending a big hug (( )).
Wow, Phoebe! Thank you so much for sharing your story! Hugs to you, and I can't wait to read the rest!
Phoebe ~~
Thank you so much for sharing this.
I to had a child when I was 21 and not married. Boy did my life change!
I will have to share it sometime with you. God was very graceful with me!
I now have ten children ;-)
Sometimes it feels like this big black cloud I need to hide.
But after reading this I know I don't have to "hide it"
I can't wait to read the rest of your story.
Have a great day!
Blessings-
Rachelle
Phoebe,
Once again you've been obedient and I've found that we have similar stories in this life journey. Can't wait to hear the rest!
Melissa Reynolds
Thanks for sharing this! I got pregnant at age 18 so I really identify with you in this situation. Thanks!
I just left a coment over at http://www.reallifeblog.net/2009/10/god-works-all-things-for-good-even.html And BOY! is it relevant here too!
I was set to graudate in 2000, maybe a year before you? Honors classes, sports, a scholarship. I spent my sophmore year of high school pregnant... I gave it all up to be a mom to a VERY amazing daughter.
I now have 2 daughters- 11 & almost 6 and 2 sons- 2 in Jan and one due in Jan. In April 2003 I committed my life to the Lord and never looked back. I struggle often with emotional aspects that only young single moms could relate to. I'm in a new town with no friends and most family is not near. I'm glad to hear another's story.
I'll be adding you to Reader to follow. How old are your three kiddos now?
Allie
Oh no, you cannot leave the story there. Please finish it soon. It is like reading a wonderful book, being at the climax and being called off to an emergency and can't get back to it any time soon. Thank you in all seriousness for being so real about yourself and sharing something so personal with all of us. It is so nice to get to really know the people who care to share so much w/ us and help us all in so many areas of our own lives. Have a beautiful day.
wow, to think 2 years ago I was in the same boat, the only difference was we had some sort of a plan but it was so fast, too soon and something sooo unplanned
Thank you for your openness, my friend. Wow, that must have been totally scary and a shock. No wonder you were shaken.
My brother and his girlfriend broke up and then she found out she was expecting. Boy were they surprised (because they had just broke up).
He had been planning on going to college on a scholarship but went out and got a job instead. He was 19 and they were both scared.
Having a baby, at any time, can be scary because it's such a responsibility. But it is also such a joy!
My hubby and I tried for close to five years before I finally got pg., and I was still scared, lol!
I was a teenage mom, too, Phoebe! Isn't it funny how many things you have in common with people when you just open up! And to think - neither one of us would have ever knew had you not decided to share your story! Your courage is undeniable! Good for you ;o)
I am so honored to read your story and thankful that sharing mine (as scary as it was) has led to others being open....I can't wait to hear the rest and admire your courage for sharing...I know it is hard to put yourself out there. God bless!!
Can't wait to hear the rest of your story. I love how you "keep it real" on your blog. It's nice to see someone being real, not pretending to be a perfect, mom, wife, friend, etc. None of us are perfect! We need to stop beating ourselves up over it and support each other!
I can't wait to hear the rest of your story!
My first pregnancy was planned and I was married (I married *young* - right after my 17th birthday), but my second pregnancy was unplanned and about half a year after my divorce.
Although it was rough dealing with it at first...especially telling my religious parents...everything worked out for the best!
I'm now married to my then-boyfriend and he's been a seriously amazing father and husband. I'm very blessed :)
Thank you for sharing your story -- I've been following your blog for a long time now, and continue to be encouraged. I'm looking forward to hearing about all that God's done in your life.
I love your courage in telling this story Phoebe! Can't wait to read more. I SO wish I could meet you in person..I know I would love you just as much in person as I do on your blog :)
thank you for sharing your story.
I also became pregnant while my parents were not too happy with my boyfriend choice. They didnt have a huge problem with him but they didnt think our relationship was very good for either one of us and at time I would have agreed. Then I found out I was pregnant while in college not long after.
I took the pregnancy test in the bathroom at work and called my best friend who had recently given birth to a son.
I know how scared you must have been. Thank you for sharing your story!
I am a friend of Sarah's and one of the 10 Amigas. I am hooked on your story. Can't wait to read more. I What courage and character it takes to tell your story! I know you are an amazing woman! Will be back for sure!
Beautiful and courageous!
Is it wrong that I just cracked up thinking about your goofy teenaged self thinking "I'll leave a note and they'll wait patiently until tomorrow to talk about it"?
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